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From The Rectory
September 2006

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My dear Friends.

Well, it is good to know that some people read my letter (at least the July one) for a number of you have made reference to Sudoku puzzles and one person even bought me a 'Mammoth Book of Sudoku Puzzles! Maybe if I write about £50 notes. John with teacup

Instead let me quote something which arrived on my desk a few weeks ago but I cannot remember who gave it to me. It is my sense of humour but it is much more than that, for it touches on issues which to me seem so very important. I love this country, I wouldn't want to live anywhere else but I am not happy with the way things seem to be going. Maybe you feel the same. The article goes like this:-

OBITUARY

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of Common Sense who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valued lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health rapidly began to deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a six year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition!
He declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student, but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant.

Over time, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, spilled it in her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement from McDonalds.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion, his daughter, Responsibility, and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepsisters, May Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

God bless you
Yours sincerely

John's signature

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shoebury, shoeburyness, st peter, st andrew, peter's, andrew's, essex, anglican, protestant, church, cofe, church of england, chelmsford, southend-on-sea, southendThe Anglican Parish of South Shoebury chelmsford essex