My dear Friends.

On coming home recently from holiday I started opening the post and was saddened to read that my training Vicar during my first curacy in Fuiham had died and his funeral service was two days later over in South Harrow, Middlesex. Apparently it happened so quickly. Only 5 weeks before he died he was diagnosed with advanced pancreatic cancer which then spread to the liver and the lung.

Philip and Margaret were a wonderful inspiration and example to us in those 3 years in Fulham. He had trained as a lawyer and she was a paediatrician and it was soon clear to me that they were both very intelligent! However, they were full of fun, down to earth and recognised that while they may be gifted in certain things others are gifted in other ways and therefore equally important.

I learnt so much from Philip during those 3 years and I was sad I could not make the funeral service, but I hope to be able to go to a Thanksgiving Service which is being held in June. 1 would expect the Church to be full to overflowing as Philip enriched the lives of so many through his ministry for our Lord. How about offering up a prayer of thanks for those who have enriched your life - especially those who have helped you so much in your life as a Christian.

Sadly on return from holiday I was unable to go to another funeral service, this time of someone in our own Church. I have been taking Holy Communion to Barbara in her own home for a few years and before I went on holiday I visited her in hospital. Sadly she died whilst I was away and the service was booked in the hope I would be able to conduct it on my return. That proved impossible as I had already committed myself to funeral number three.

This was a reminder to me that 'in parish life you cannot always be there for people. You hope to, you try to be there, but you cannot do everything and sometimes, sadly, you have to say no. I just hope people understand when I have to make such decisions.

The reason for saying no to conducting Barbara's funeral was that it was booked for the same day as my cousin Jill's funeral. She died of cancer aged 48, having been married to Andy for 12 years and being blessed with two lovely children Jade (10) and Harry (8).

I have always warmed to Jill - she was very blunt and there were no sides with her. You always knew where you stood with her. After a major operation to remove her stomach she did her best to get back to normal, but after just a few months the cancer returned even more aggressively and in the time they had left the family packed in as much as they could. Jill herself determined to sort out as much as she could - she asked me to take the funeral, decided on a more distant Crematorium as she did not like the nearest one, chose the music for her funeral, sorted out all the finances with Andy etc. etc. She did so because she loved, she cared and she wanted to make things as easy as possible for her husband.

She was one courageous person and she enriched the lives of so many in those final months. At a time like that it would be so easy to be inward looking, but not Jill and I give you just one example of her concern for others right up to the end.

I saw her a couple of weeks before she died (she lived near Woking so I was not able to visit as much as I would have liked). She had been in a lot of pain but had come home for a few days from the Hospice. She was lying in bed, sovery thin and so very sleepy. As I was about to go I kissed her for the last time and she opened her eyes and asked how my little grandson William was.

As I drove away from their home I thought to myself 'I just hope 1 can be as dignified, caring, courageous and concerned for others as she is.

May our Lord be very close to you in life and in the hour of death.

God bless you
Yours sincerely

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